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Even twenty years into marriage, Helen Ellis's husband still makes her heart pitter patter. The New York Times bestselling author paints a portrait of true romance for our times in these surprising, sexy, and hilariously frank essays about love, marriage, and her last first kiss. "Ellis is one of our greatest living humorists, in the same league as Sedaris and Irby...A fascinating portrait of middle-aged love." --Ann Napolitano, New York Times bestselling author of Dear Edward Welcome to the Coral Lounge, a room in Helen Ellis's New York City apartment painted such an exuberant shade that a Peeping Tom left a sticky note asking for the color. It is in the Coral Lounge where all the parties happen: A game called "What's in the box?" makes its uproarious debut, the Puzzle Posse pounces on a 500-piece jigsaw of a beheaded priest, and guests don blindfolds for a raucous bridal shower. When the pandemic shuts down the city, the Coral Lounge becomes a place of refuge, where Helen and her husband binge-watch Joan Collins's Dynasty, dote on two spoiled cats, and where Helen discovers that even twenty years into marriage, her husband still makes her heart pitter patter.
"Welcome to the Coral Lounge, a room in Helen Ellis's New York City apartment painted such an exuberant shade of Sherman Williams that a peeping Tom once left a sticky note with the doorman asking for the color. It is in the Coral Lounge that the magic of Helen's marriage unfolds: shindigs where strangers swap clothing in the powder room, a party game called 'What's in the box?' makes its uproarious debut, the Puzzle Posse pounces on a 500-piece jigsaw of a beheaded priest. Then, when the pandemic shuts down the city, the Coral Lounge becomes a place of refuge, where Helen and her husband eat take-out while sitting on the floor like toddlers, dragging French fries through a ketchup swamp, where they sing to the two enormous cats who chew on Helen's hair while she sleeps, and where they while away the hours with Mexican Viagra and the ensuing neck injury. In these surprising, romantic, sexy, and hilariously frank essays Helen Ellis paints a portrait of true romance for our times"--
"Welcome to the Coral Lounge, a room in Helen Ellis's New York City apartment painted such an exuberant shade of Sherman Williams that a peeping Tom once left a sticky note with the doorman asking for the color. It is in the Coral Lounge that the magic of Helen's marriage unfolds: Shindigs where strangers swap clothing in the powder room, a party game called 'What's in the box?' makes its uproarious debut, the Puzzle Posse pounces on a 500-piece jigsaw of a beheaded priest. Then, when the pandemic shuts down the city, the Coral Lounge becomes a place of refuge, where Helen and her husband eat take-out while sitting on the floor like toddlers, dragging French fries through a ketchup swamp, where they sing to the two enormous cats who chew on Helen's hair while she sleeps, and where they while away the hours with Mexican Viagra and the ensuing neck injury. In these surprising, romantic, sexy, and hilariously frank essays Helen Ellis paints a portrait of true romance for our times"--
What is it truly like being a son or daughter who leaves home to live in an expat/migrant setting? How does it feel to be geographically separated from your parents, grandparents and other family members? Maybe you've left home for your studies, your career, a sense of adventure, for a challenge, for love. But how do you venture forth into your global world and still retain and nourish connections with 'home', always knowing "it was my choice to leave"? Researcher, anthropologist and founder of DistanceFamilies.com, Helen Ellis, shares ideas, resources and stories to arm readers with the wisdom to maintain rich and fulfilling relationships with their Distance Family. You'll come away refreshed and rebooted knowing that you can all be close - despite the distance. If you are a parent, grandparent or extended family member living back home, are you proud and graciously accepting of your family's move or do you harbour feelings of resentment? All reactions and emotions are normal. This book will make a difference to your Distance Family. With knowledge comes understandingWith understanding comes empathyAnd empathy is a good thing for Distance Families. Being a Distance Son or Daughter - a Book for ALL Generations is the second part of a three-book series.
Three girls are navigating the treacherous passages of adolescence in this Southern gothic novel. Weaving their intersecting schemes, Ellis creates a hilarious, often shocking and violent parody of Southern life and of the rivalries, wickedness, and outrageous behavior familiar to the teen experience.
"e;I loved it."e;Ann PatchettThe bestselling author of American Housewife ("e;Dark, deadpan and truly inventive."e; --The New York Times Book Review) is back with a fiercely funny collection of essays on marriage and manners, thank-you notes and three-ways, ghosts, gunshots, gynecology, and the Calgon-scented, onion-dipped, monogrammed art of living as a Southern Lady.Helen Ellis has a mantra: "e;If you don't have something nice to say, say something not-so-nice in a nice way."e; Say "e;weathered"e; instead of "e;she looks like a cake left out in the rain."e; Say "e;early-developed"e; instead of "e;brace face and B cups."e; And for the love of Coke Salad, always say "e;Sorry you saw something that offended you"e; instead of "e;Get that stick out of your butt, Miss Prissy Pants."e; In these twenty-three raucous essays Ellis transforms herself into a dominatrix Donna Reed to save her marriage, inadvertently steals a $795 Burberry trench coat, witnesses a man fake his own death at a party, avoids a neck lift, and finds a black-tie gown that gives her the confidence of a drag queen. While she may have left her home in Alabama, married a New Yorker, forgotten how to drive, and abandoned the puffy headbands of her youth, Helen Ellis is clinging to her Southern accent like mayonnaise to white bread, and offering readers a hilarious, completely singular view on womanhood for both sides of the Mason-Dixon.
A collection of dark, funny short stories: Miranda July channelling Beyonce...
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