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It does NOT take a village to raise a child...it just takes good parenting.Creating safe neighborhoods and safe communities is NOT the responsibility of the President of the United States. Neither is it the responsibility of the Police, Schools, or Politicians. Community safety is the responsibility of parents. In my Parents on a Mission (POM) program I consistently encourage parents that they are the number one asset in the community...they are the most important person in the community-not the police, pastor, priest, principal of the school, or politicians-parents are in the best position to determine the health and safety of the community since it is they who have the future citizens under their care to nurture, discipline, and provide guidance during the most impressionable years of a child's life. In POM I encourage parents to understand that they are not only raising "their kids", but they are also raising our citizens as our families all share "our neighborhoods", attend "our schools" and befriend "our kids". Therefore, the ultimate outcome of what goes on inside our homes daily, directly relates to the condition of the safety and health of the larger community. After all, where do the citizens of the community come from? They come from our home. Thus, the question is, what kind of citizen are we sending into the community, the neighborhood, schools, parks, and playgrounds every day? The fact is the community is depending upon parents to raise responsible and respectful citizens that will make a positive contribution to the community as future leaders in business, education, religion, government, and a variety of other important roles that make up the community, the most important of which is becoming what I call a "parent on a mission", which is the subject of this book.Although I understand this whole village proverb is well intended, it was meant for a different time, place, and culture. It's not the message parents need in today's culture of competition with 24/7 access to internet information, programs, and peer pressure through social media. Our intention is not to blame parents but to name parents as the most important people in the community. What we want from the "village" is help, not control of our children. That is our responsibility. If we parents are willing to take part of the credit for the success of our children, we ought to be just as willing to accept part of the responsibility when our children fail in their social responsibilities as citizens of the larger community. I never assume that when children go astray that the parent is a bad person, negligent, or abusive. But what I have found is that many parents have simply never really learned many of the principles taught in the POM curriculum that I share in this book. Those who have learned these principles and practice them, in most cases, have healthy relationships with their kids who are leading productive lives. These parents usually learned how to have a healthy relationship with their kids from their parents, or whoever was the principal person who raised them as children. Yet, all too often, many of us lacked parents who could demonstrate to us how to go about building healthy human relationships and thus we end up using the age-old philosophy of child rearing; "If it was good enough for me, it's good enough for you", but in many cases this philosophy doesn't produce healthy parent-child relationships. As parents respond to the ideas, and consistently practice the principles and encouragement in this book, I am confident they will have the same life transformation I call the "POM experience".
At the age of 11 I got involved with the juvenile criminal justice system. Richard Ramos was one of the few people in my life that was supportive and unconditional. He would come to my house any time my mother was having difficulty with me. He would hunt me down on the streets to get me to school or back home. With the support of Mr. Ramos I was able to transition from offender to a young woman ready to take on the world. I received my Bachelors Degree in Criminal Justice from Long Beach State University and Masters in Social Work from the University of Southern California. I now work as a Therapist/Social Worker with Orange County''s most vulnerable youth and families. I am truly grateful for all your work Mr. Ramos on a personal and professional level. I know your words will touch the lives of youngsters just like they once touched me. - Gabriela Hernandez, MSW, Clinical Social Worker, Orange County Mental Health "I met Richard Ramos at a crucial time in my teenage years. Meeting him opened my eyes to what a strong Latino man really looked like. His leadership during that time, and to this day, has changed my life, as well as, the lives of countless others. I now work with at-risk youth and have my own business in Ventura, Ca." - Phillip Rendon, CEO TKL Tattoo, Ventura, Ca."I was a misdirected youth involved in a gang and going in the wrong direction until I met Richard Ramos. Because of his care, concern and counseling, my life was transformed. I''m now married, raising my children and have a great job. Thank you Mr. Ramos for all you did for me and so many other Latino youth!" - Ruben Venegas, Accountant, Santa Barbara, Ca.
Parents on a Mission is the best prevention strategy against gangs!Why do kids join gangs? My first-hand experience throughout many years of working with gang members and at-risk Latino youth and families shows that the root of the problem-as well as the solution-lies within the parent-child relationship. Out of countless hours of counseling and listening to young gang members and their parents talk about their home life, the concept of Parents on a Mission was born. Its purpose is to turn the hearts of parents and children to one another through implementing a strategy of forgiveness and reconciliation. Parents on a Mission is a working solution that addresses problems in a most practical, inexpensive, truthful, and caring way. This book focuses on:Why parents are the best prevention strategy against gangsWhy gang members are not the enemyInside-out vs. outside-in community solutionsA look at gangs, authority figures, and the economics of povertyThe Seven Principles to help gang members become productive studentsThe role of faith-based engagement in building the character of students on the school campus
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