Through the Lies - Fahd Alvina - Bog

"Please, stop for a few minutes and let us continue later," I beg my husband with my eyes brimmed with tears. I am in severe pain.
Aziz and I got married a month ago and due to an unexpected reason, we just moved to our rented apartment yesterday. Aziz broke my hymen last night. Left to me, I don't want us to copulate again till my private part bruises heal but I don't have a choice since Aziz said he wants it. So doing it now and with this kind of pain I am going through at the moment, I want him to stop thrusting.
Aziz pauses, looks into my eyes with a grimace and says,
"If I stop right now and stand up, just know that I will never copulate with you again till as long as we live. I swear to the God who made me." He says it with his eyes focused on me, breathing heavily and with the look on his face, one will know that he means every word he just said.
I blink twice at his words, feeling tears in my cheeks. I feel like I am in dreamland.
Definitely a dream. I don't want to believe those inconsiderate words could come out of my husband's mouth knowing fully well that I am not faking the pain, speaking of what I went through last night before I was deflowered by him.
Seeing how serious he is while saying what he just said and even swore with Allah's name, I don't want to gamble. And because I had seen someone in that shoe before, her husband swore never to touch her ever again and stood on the words till the woman expired. I don't want to live my life like that. I don't want my marriage to be dead on arrival. I want a blissful marriage. So I say,
"I am sorry. I am so sorry. Let's continue." He rolls his eyes at me, hiss and continues thrusting up and down insouciantly.
Another set of tears roll down my eyes but I turn my head to the other side to hide it in order not to provoke him more. He continues thrusting while my private parts and lap are hurting like they are on fire.
Many thoughts run through my mind within a moment.
What is going on with him? Did I do something wrong? What causes Aziz to change his attitude like this? This is not how he talks to me when we were courting. We courted for five months, getting to know one another and planning our wedding but he has never raised his voice at me nor talked to me with a serious tone but what changes? My mind is full of many thoughts coupled with the pain I am feeling down there.
I have definitely wronged him. Maybe I did something wrong. I will ask him about it later and apologize. I think to myself.
Aziz stands up when he is done without looking at my face or even bothering to ask how I am feeling and enters the bathroom.
"Won't you stand up and clean up?" Aziz says to me as soon as he comes out of the bathroom a few minutes later.
"I will. I am just taking my time because I am in pain." I say but he rolls his eyes at me and says,
"What pain are you feeling that people haven't felt before? Stand up, be a woman and let's go."
"Let's go? To where? Are we going somewhere together?" I ask in a low and respectful tone.
"Yes. We are going to visit our other neighbours. They invited us to a meeting." Aziz says sharply and leaves the room, murmuring on his way out.
I struggle to stand up and limp to the kitchen. I boil water, use it to bathe and use the remaining to massage my private part to reduce the pain I am feeling down there.
An hour later, I am done and I walk to the sitting room where Aziz is sitting impatiently, waiting for me.
"I am ready," I say,
"I thought you wanted to turn yourself into a fish in the bathroom." He hisses and stands up.
"Let's go." He adds.